


epistolary

by chrkrose



Series: constant. [4]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin
Genre: Canon Divergence, F/M, Fluff, No Incest, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-13
Updated: 2019-12-13
Packaged: 2021-02-25 20:47:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21781699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chrkrose/pseuds/chrkrose
Summary: twenty nine times Jaime and Brienne write to each other and one letter that seals their fates.
Relationships: Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth
Series: constant. [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1555945
Comments: 19
Kudos: 184





	epistolary

_Dear Brienne,_

_I hope everything is going well with you and that this letter find you and your father in good health. You are probably surprised to receive a raven from me, but don’t be. Father makes me practice my writing everyday, and I thought “why not write to someone who I actually want to write instead of writing to people I don’t even know”. So that’s the reason why I’m writing to you. I asked father if I could send you a raven and he allowed as long as I continued with my duty of training my reading and writing every morning, and practiced with my sword every afternoon. The sword practice is my favorite part of the day so that is easy to follow, but I hate writing and reading. Father says I need it because one day I will be the Lord of Casterly Rock. Cersei was not pleased to learn she won’t be Lord (Lady?) of Casterly Rock and cried all night when father told us that. It made me feel bad. I wouldn't mind if she wanted to be. The more I learn about being a Lord, the least I like the fact I will be one someday. How do you feel about being the Evenstar one day? I like the sound of it more than I like “Lord of Casterly Rock”, but I imagine you are learning the same things I am having to learn even though you are a girl. You are already much better with your writing and reading than I am. I am better at sword fighting though. When we meet again I will show you._

_Father does not allow Cersei to practice sword fighting because she’s a girl and she is mad about that too. It makes me sad for her, but I am also angry that she seems like she blames me for what father is doing. It is not my fault. If I could choose, I would gladly have her doing my duties for me (with the exception of my sword practice). Father says I still have a lot to learn, especially with my writing. I find it hard, because the letters keep dancing in front of me. Does that happens to you as well?_

_I liked Tarth very much. I asked father if we would come back any time soon and he said he would invite you and your father to come to Casterly Rock in the near future. But do not tell your father that. I think father would be mad if he knew I’m telling you of his future plans._

_I hope you are not as sad as you were when I last saw you. I didn’t say anything at the time because you only smiled when we played by the water or pretended we were knights rescuing cersei or when you held Tyrion, so I didn’t want to talk about it and see you stop smiling, but I listened to you crying one night calling for your brother. I was not doing it on purpose I swear. I just couldn’t sleep because my skin was burning so much and I ended up hearing you (you were right I should have used that smelly oil you told me to use, your skin seemed fine even though you spent more time under the sun than all of us)._

_I think I don’t have anything else to say to you, so I’ll finish my letter. It would be very kind of you if you could reply to this, so I know that you received it. And I am sorry if some of it doesn’t make sense, my writing is not the best. Sometimes I confuse a few letters and the words end up funny (father does not think it so though. My ear is still hurting from the last time he caught one of those mistakes)._

_Jaime Lannister_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Dear Jaime,_

_I was indeed surprised to receive your raven, but also glad that you wrote to me. How is your family? I hope this letter find you all in good health. I miss little Tyrion the most. I hope your sister has warmed up to him._

_I am indeed suffering from the same problems you are, although they are different in nature. Septa Roelle keeps trying to teach me needle work but I simply cannot do it right. She had also forbidden me from practicing sword fighting but father told me I was to learn everything, so I still practice anyway. I doubt you are better than me though. I’m told I am very good._

_I am really sorry about your sister being upset with you. I understand it must be difficult for her to be forbidden of doing things that she wanted to do. But I am sure she will come around. Brothers and sisters should always have each other’s best interest at heart but sometimes it’s hard when you are treated unfairly. She doesn’t realize it yet, but being the Lord or Lady of a place is hard work and not always very rewarding wouldn’t you say? Sometimes I wish Galladon was still alive, for he would be the one being trained to assume father’s position as the Evenstar. I feel selfish when I think of that, because there’s so many more reasons to wish he was alive, and I feel them all, but this thought comes to mind sometimes, especially when I’m learning needle work (not that I think Galladon would have to learn needle work. I don’t think it would be necessary. Do you have to learn needle work?). I feel sad sometimes about him. I miss him a lot. And don’t worry about having listened to me crying, I’m sorry I disturbed you in the middle of the night._

_I’m excited by the prospect of visiting your home. Do not worry, I won’t tell a soul until we receive an official invitation but I’m happy you told me there’s a possibility, for now I have something to look forward to. It was very fun to have you and your siblings here for all those weeks, and I’m glad you liked it so much._

_There was indeed some mistakes on your letter but I could understand you well enough. I never saw the letters dancing in front of me while writing though. It must be difficult to write when it happens._

_Brienne of Tarth_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


* * *

_Wench,_

_I am not sending you this letter as an apology. I’m sending this letter because I think you should apologize to me, but I know you’re too stubborn to do it, so I’m reminding you that you should and that if you do it, I will certainly read it and reply to you._

  
  


_Jaime Lannister_

_Ps: You must know that father is planning for us to visit Tarth soon once more. I hope it turns out better than your visit to Casterly Rock. Maybe if you’re less pigheaded, it will be a much more pleasant time._

  
  
  
  
  


_Jaime Lannister of Casterly Rock,_

_I have nothing to apologize for, you should be the one apologizing to me, first for your behavior while I was visiting, and second for sending me a letter filled with insults._

  
  


_Brienne of Tarth._

_Ps: my name is Brienne. Not wench. Brienne._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


* * *

_Dear Wench of Tarth ,_

_I’m sorry it took me so long to reply to your last raven. Father found one of the parchments I had written down what I sent to you (although what he found was a much more crude and angry version) and was not pleased that I was wasting ravens with “childish games”. As you can imagine, I was banned from sending any letters for some time, but I finally got permission to write you this._

_Now that some time has passed, I’m not so angry at you anymore. I actually catch myself remembering our spar sessions and training with our master-at-arms. I also went to that cliff we jumped from while you were here and it reminded me of you again, which is why I convinced father to allow me access to the ravens once more._

_I’m not sure about when father is planning to visit, he keeps telling me it will be “soon” but never gives me a real answer._

  
  


_Jaime Lannister (of Casterly Rock)._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Dear Jaime,_

_This letter will probably find you already in preparations for your upcoming visit. We received a Raven from your father not long after your own to me, so he probably told you already that you will be sailing for Tarth a few moons from now._

_I’m not as angry with you either, so let’s move past what happened._

_I missed Casterly Rock as well, although I still rather swim in the waters of Tarth. I think I missed Casterly Rock more because of your company and Tyrion’s. I would say Cersei as well but she barely spoke to me while I was there. I hope she’s well._

_I have some bad news, to which I’m less than thrilled to share. Father has arranged me a match. I’ll be meeting him tomorrow. Wish me luck. I know I’m not very pleasant to the eye, but I think I’ll be a good wife despite my many lackings._

  
  


_Brienne of Tarth._

_Ps: my name is Brienne. Must you keep calling me wench just to annoy me?_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Dear Brienne,_

  
  


_Who is your betrothed? Why is your father pushing for marriage so soon? You’re three and ten, there’s still plenty of time for you to find a suitable husband. I’ll probably know all about it when we arrive on Tarth anyhow, I bet there’s nothing else you’ll want to talk about._

_(I don’t know what you mean about not being pleasant to the eye. What is that supposed to mean? Why would it displease him to look at you? Your eyes are very blue and calm, and I like counting the freckles on your face. If he has any wits in his brain, he’ll feel the same way)._

_I suppose you’re happy in becoming someone else’s wife, even though we probably won’t visit each other as often after you marry. Very well then. I wish you luck on your marriage._

_Jaime Lannister._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


* * *

_Dear Jaime,_

  
  


_It pains me to see you leaving once more. You have become my dearest friend and the only person I can be honest with. I couldn’t tell you while you were here, but it was the knowledge that you’d be coming soon that soothed the heartache of Ronnet’s words. Strange how I can write you telling you all of this but it’s very hard to tell you that to your face._

_As I told you while you were here, I hope father does not arrange for another match. I know you disagree, but the truth is only one and must be faced: I don’t have much else to offer a husband other than being heir to Tarth. Still, I wish father would give up and leave me to find myself my own husband when time comes._

_I made myself a promise that I would only marry a man that could beat me on sword fight._

_I hope this finds you in good health._

_Brienne of Tarth._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Wench,_

_Stop calling yourself ugly. It angers me whenever someone calls you that, even if it’s you calling yourself that._

_I might have given Red Ronnet a piece of my mind last time I saw him in court when me and father visited King’s Landing. But do not worry my lady, he still lives. Do not waste your time shedding tears for the likes of him._

_I must tell you wench, I’m now a Knight. I was knighted by Ser Arthur Dayne himself. Me, a Knight! At five and ten! Although I intended to write you all about it, father informed me we are once more visiting Tarth so I chose to tell you in person and show you how exactly it happened. Tyrion was very happy for me, but I feel like he does not understand how much knighthood is important. Cersei didn’t care much, but she never cares much for anything outside things that are important to her. I feel you will understand though. I cannot wait to tell you in person._

_I must admit your skills with the blade are quite impressive. If you’ll only marry a man who can beat you at sword fight, I believe it’s going to be a while until you find a suitable husband. Although if I recall, I beated you after a few minutes of our dance. If I ever proposed to you, you would have to accept me. Unless you’d break your oath. Now I’m most pleased imagining your face while reading this, knowing that if I decide to marry you, there’s nothing you can do about it._

_Jaime Lannister._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Dear Jaime,_

_You’re probably in preparations for your upcoming visit, I still hope this reaches you before you leave._

_It does not please me to hear about you fighting Red Ronnet. If he’s not worth my tears, then he’s definitely not worth you wasting your time with the likes of him. Words are wind, as my father says. It’s best to forget about him._

_I’m most excited to hear all about your knighthood. If only women could be knights. It would most please me to see myself as a knight as well. It matters not though, I’m very proud of you. Do not spare any details once you arrive. I’ll make sure you won’t._

_I hope you travel safely and I’m looking forward to see you once more._

_Brienne of Tarth_

_Ps: I’m choosing to ignore your jape about my oath. Rest assured if I knew you intended to propose, my training would increase drastically._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


* * *

_Dear Wench,_

_I left this letter with your father so he could give it to you on your name day._

_I’d like nothing more than to spend your name day with you, as your father confessed me that he would be giving you a new horse. It would be very fun to ride around Tarth, I already miss that lake you showed me just yesterday (In case he has not given it to you yet, I apologize for spoiling the surprise. Please pretend you knew nothing about it)._

_I hope you like the necklace attached to this letter. And if not, the sapphire and gold could perhaps buy you something else you enjoy?_

_Jaime Lannister_

_Ps: why wench, now I feel as if you’re challenging me. I guess I’ll have to best you the next time I visit (or if you visit me first) and then you’ll have to marry me._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Dear Jaime,_

_I must say the necklace is one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. I would never sell it for anything, it’s my most precious possession. I avoid using it while training with maester Goodwin, but other than that, it’s always around my neck._

_You did spoil my name day gift (and although I tried to pretend to father I didn’t know anything about the horse, I’m not a good liar). But it matters not. I was happy all the same._

_I hope you made it safely back to Casterly Rock. Please write me back as soon as you can. I don’t know why, but receiving a letter from you knowing you’re writing while so far away makes me feel as if we’re still connected. Do not misunderstand me, I loved you took the time to write me something while we were still in each other’s company, but knowing that you still consider me as a friend to the point of taking some of your time to write me makes me happier. Does that make sense? I don’t even know._

_Brienne of Tarth._

_Ps: if you feel challenged, that’s on you, not me. But don’t be so confident about your skills beating mine just because you’re now a knight. You might be surprised Ser Jaime._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Wench,_

_I’m back to Casterly Rock. I’m glad you enjoyed the necklace, it pleases me to know you wear it so often. Now everyone who sees it will know we’re close, which I like._

_And don’t you worry, I’ll always take some of my time to write to you. If ravens were faster, I’d probably write you almost every day._

_I’m now the one who has bad news to share. There’s gossip from the servants around the rock that father wants to wed me to Lysa Tully. He’s planning for us to visit the Tully’s in a few weeks but I do not want to go. Lysa is not the person I would choose as a wife._

_Ser Jaime Lannister._

  
  


_Ps: I feel challenged._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


* * *

_Dear wench,_

_It’s been a while since I have received news from you. I asked father if there was any news concerning Tarth that could explain your silence, but everything seems in order._

_I’m leaving tomorrow to visit the Tullys. Please write me back when you can._

  
  


_Jaime Lannister_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Dear Jaime,_

_Forgive me for taking so long to reply to your last raven. At this time you’re probably back from Riverrun since many moons have passed since the last time you wrote me. I do not know if you’re now betrothed to Lysa, but if so, congratulations._

_I don’t have much to tell you other than the news that father arranged another match. It did not end well. I believe he has given up marrying me to someone else._

_I suppose it matters not if you felt challenged or not since now you’re probably betrothed. Still, if you ever decide to visit Tarth, I would gladly settle down the matter of who would win._

_Brienne of Tarth._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Brienne,_

_Who was your betrothed? Why it didn’t work out? And why did you take so long to write me back?_

_I’m not betrothed to Lysa Tully. As I told you, she’s not the one I’d choose as a bride and I told father as much. Not that he listens to anything I ever say to him, but it seems like he was displeased with the Tully’s for reasons that go beyond what he shares with me. It suffices to say the wedding won’t happen._

_But enough of this talk. There’s something different in your letter. I don’t know what. But you sounded different. Are you tired of writing me? You do not want to receive my ravens anymore? What’s the matter? Why did you take so long to write me back? I thought something has happened. I was seriously considering getting on a boat and sail to Tarth._

_Please answer me this as soon as you get this letter. Otherwise I will get on a boat and sail to your island. I’m not jesting._

_Jaime Lannister._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Dear Jaime,_

_I received your raven a few hours ago. I’m now writing this back to you._

_Forgive me. There’s nothing happening. I should have written back to you. But certain things prevented me from doing so. Please accept my apologies. I do not wish to discuss this further, but rest assured that I would never get tired of writing to you or receiving your letters. I’m sorry if I ever made you feel like this was possible._

_As you know, my name day came and went once more. There was a ball. I met Renly Baratheon. He was really kind to me, which surprised me. He even asked me for a dance._

_But I must say I wish you had been here._

_I hope you find the time to write back to me. But I understand if you’re not so inclined to do it so, after my behavior._

  
  


_Brienne of Tarth_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Brienne,_

_Will you wed Renly Baratheon?_

_Jaime Lannister_

_Ps: Apologies accepted._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Dear Jaime,_

_I was very much surprised by how short your last letter was. I hope I haven’t jeopardize our friendship beyond repair. Have you really accepted my apologies?_

_I will not wed Renly. I don’t know where do you get these notions. It’s not as if I have a line with suitors begging for my hand._

_Besides my oath still stands. I don’t think Renly would be able to fight me, even if he proposed, which he didn’t._

_I hope you’re well. Send my regards to Tyrion as well._

_Brienne of Tarth_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Wench,_

_I apologize. I was still mad when I wrote you the last letter, which is why it was so short._

_I wish to discuss the reasons why you stopped writing me, but it’s something we should do in person. And with this I bring you good news. Father will travel to King’s Landing soon and I heard he would send for your father to meet him there. I’ll join him on this trip. Could you request your father for you to come along as well? We could meet in the capital._

_Jaime Lannister._

  
  
  
  
  


_Dear Jaime,_

_Father allowed me to come with him, so I’m most excited to see you once I arrive in King’s Landing. I’ll make this short since we’re supposed to meet in less than a week so there’s no need to waste words that can be said in person._

_Brienne of Tarth._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


* * *

_Wench,_

_I found a secret passage that leads straight to the maidenvault from beside the royal sept. On the verse of this note there’s a drawing explaining how you can leave the apartments without the guards catching you. Meet me at the courtyard in half an hour._

_J._

  
  
  
  
  
  


_Wench,_

_Meet me at the the alcove beside the royal sept in half an hour._

_J._

  
  
  
  
  


_Wench,_

_Meet me at the gardens, beneath the second tree, the one with the bench._

_J._

  
  
  


_Wench,_

_Meet me at the armory in half an hour._

_J._

  
  


_Brienne,_

_I don’t know what came over me. You leave tomorrow, and I just let myself be carried away. Please please forgive me. It was not in jest, I swear it._

_J._

  
  
  
  


* * *

_Dear Jaime,_

_As I write, I see you becoming smaller and smaller while the ship sails away from King’s Landing._

_I must tell you I had a very pleasant time in your company. From the notes you wrote me everyday, to the time spent with you, either training, talking or simply passing the time, there’s nothing I would change about the time we spent together._

_There’s no need to discuss what happened on my last day in the armory. I understand it was perhaps a lapse of judgment. It’s normal for boys at seven and ten to act impulsive, or so Septa Roelle told me. And I forgive you. Perhaps I let myself be carried away as well, so I apologize in turn. For a moment I thought you were jesting, that somehow it would be a jape at my expense, but I know I judged you unfairly, and you would never do that. I’m sorry I ran away._

_Let’s forget about that kiss. There’s nothing to it._

_I hope you’re able to visit Tarth soon enough. I still must beat you at our dance._

_Brienne of Tarth._

  
  
  
  
  
  


_Dear Brienne,_

_I arrived at Casterly Rock to find your letter waiting for me. Had I read this while still in King’s Landing, I might have followed your request and pretended that nothing happened between us._

_But while traveling back home, my thoughts forced me to face the truth. And that cannot be denied no longer, my lady._

_My companions know much about you, since my mouth hasn’t shut up about you since you kissed it. The idea that you might kiss it again is stuck in my mind, which hasn’t stopped thinking about you since, well, before any kiss._

_I cannot forget about that Brienne, same as I can’t forget all these years where I waited for your letter just to feel myself close to you, or about the way you felt in my arms for the brief moment I was allowed to hold you. I cannot forget about our afternoons spent at the gardens or practicing or sharing our secrets and the things that move us forward because that would be forgetting about a part of myself, the part I like the most._

_I would not have you give up the sword or any of the things that make you who you are. I would not have you change one thing about you, for to me you’re perfect the way you are. Pigheaded, stubborn wench._

_You swore an oath that you would only wed a man who beat you at sword fight._

_Marry me Brienne._

_Jaime Lannister_

_Ps: I’ll wait for your answer my lady, and if you’ll have me, I’ll sail for Tarth as soon as your raven arrives._

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_Dear Jaime,_

  
  


_Yes. A thousand times yes._

  
  


_Brienne of Tarth_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


* * *

_To the Evenstar,_

_I hope this letter finds you in good health, my lord. My son and heir, Jaime Lannister of Casterly Rock, wishes to ask for you daughter’s hand in marriage. I believe it’s an union that would benefit both Casterly Rock and Tarth, uniting the westerlands and the stormlands and providing for both our lands other options of exploring the natural resources we have available, as we have been discussing for so many years._

_Me and Jaime are sailing for Tarth in a fortnight to make the betrothal official._

  
  


_Sincerely,_

_Lord Tywin Lannister of Casterly Rock_

_Warden of the West._

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Jaime’s last letter telling Brienne about their kiss comes from Alex Turner note written in a napkin to his girlfriend at the time, Alexa Chung.
> 
> Jaime is the kind of guy who kisses a girl and wants to marry her, and Brienne says yes of course, I don’t make the rules, they are romantic fools.


End file.
